Fluorescent Dreams Wax Cylinders - Question Of The Day...

Who are you, how did you get in here, is that camera on, get out of my Bathroom!

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We apologize for this break in your normally scheduled programs. This is a test of an annoyingly piercing loud noise. If you should hear this noise, you should *BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP*.

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"Hi, I'm a prophet of God. If you don't send money to me at (my address), he's going to kill me, then your family, then you. Again, my address is (my address), please send money or God will kill everyone."

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"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

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Not a damn thing. Because America would be too busy wondering who was going to win American Idol to care.

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2:00 clear throat
1:59 Legalize it.
1:57 Bring them home.
1:55 Electric cars are not just for Ed Begley.
1:53 Your god isn't dead, he's hiding in shame.
1:51 Eva Amurri, marry me.
1:49 Listen to Coltrane
1:47 I yield the rest of my time to the distinguished gentleman from Illinois, thanks.

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You stole my meme!

I'd also have behind me pictures of 2000, 2005, 2007 summer ice-pack on the north pole playing behind me.

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"Sub-Prime loan getting you down? Worried about your past indiscretions? The First Virtual Church of Dog has the answer! Pay $5.00 and not only will I *guarantee* your debts will be writtem off but *all* your current and future sins will be forgiven! Call 1-800-SAVIOR now with your credit-card number"


[Offer not valid in Utah or California. Your mileage may vary. Void where prohibited by law. No refunds. Objects in mirror may be stupider than they appear]

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I seriously believe, if given the opportunity like this, I would fail to say anything.

I would need weeks to prepare, and much more time on the set to say what needs to be said. And if given that time, I think I could make a difference.

But when just now asked, and not in two minutes -- and that's what is wrong with television news casts :(

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I would donate my time to a spokesperson for a cause I believed in... such as www.kiva.org

I get my own 15 seconds of fame on the occasional panel and have given my opinion to anyone interested. I'd donate it to something more important than me.

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Having no public speaking skills, I'd freeze up.

If I could overcome that, I'd probably explain what the furry fandom is ACTUALLY about...

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"Hi there. Please, be kind and loving to one another. Thanks!"

Doesn't seem to me that much more than that needs to be said.

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Don't forget to add, "No, seriously. Actually do it!"

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Unless it was NPR, I'd decline the opportunity.

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I think I'd quote the most relevant bits of "Thou Shalt Always Kill" by Dan le Sac vs. Scroobius Pip, especially the line "Thou shalt think for yourselves."

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chqi8m4CEEY here is a little melodramatic and exaggerated, but the point about "Something is terribly wrong in this country, isn't it?" and about compliance I think, is worth bringing up. And might compact quite nicely into a 2 minute time slot.

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